Key events
Our correspondent at the MKM Stadium, Will Unwin, has filed his match report. So that’s my cue to make a cheese sandwich and think about how the hell this happened to the team I write about every week. Or how the Hull.
Thanks for your company and correspondence, some of it amused, some aghast. You’re spoilt for choice now: you can tune into Clockwatch with Barry Glendenning, as the 3pm games kick off, or you can stay with the story of the day and enjoy Will’s piece.
Michael Carrick gives an interview to Jules Breach, as measured as ever. Asked what he thought of United’s performance, he says: “Some was OK… bits to improve on… We had moments, we just didn’t have that spark to put the chances away. Listen, we’re bitterly disappointed, but it won’t knock us… We can’t ignore it, we’ve got a lot to learn from it. One game doesn’t change the whole direction of everything, but we’ve still got to be aware of what need to get better.
“It’s one game, and it hurts, of course it does, but we’ll stay calm, stay in the bubble and focus on next week.” That’s when they meet another promoted club, Ipswich, who may now fancy their chances.
A pair of emails from Michael Meagher. When United went behind, he sent this: “In January 2021 I texted my brother to say that there’s no way you can win the league with a defence built around Harry Maguire…”
Now he adds: “You’ll also never win the league with an attack built around Harry Maguire!”
Hull’s defensive midfielders, Matt Crooks and Regan Slater, are talking to TNT. “Cheapest midfield two in the league!” says Crooks. What a great line.
Crooks was released by Manchester United when he was 14. “It’s the academy system, isn’t it?” he says. “It was a case of either quit or go to a new club and try to prove yourself there.”
“I don’t want to overreact to just one match,” says Kári Tulinius, “but I think the title is now Hull’s to lose.”
This result will be giving pleasure to fans up and down the country and around the world. And some of it is showing up in my inbox. “As a child of the 90’s and a Villa fan,” says David Bertram, “this is so so funny.”
Meanwhile Stephen McCrossan picks up on a telling detail. “Is it not utterly bizarre,” he asks, “that a club which has spent (and often wasted) untold millions of pounds on players still adopts the tactic of putting their big centre half up front when they’re desperate for a goal?”
So, to the table. Early doors of course, but Hull are second, trailing Arsenal only on goal difference. And Man United are 19th, with only Coventry saving them from the wooden spoon.
The first interview is with Lewie Coyle – Hull’s captain, local hero and impressive right wing-back. “This team’s got resilience,” he says. “We know what we’re doing when we’re in that sort of low block. The gaffer’s got us well drilled… But it’s a collective thing.” That’s true: the Player of the Match award should really go to the whole Hull team.
Leeds, Milan, now Hull: Carrick’s United just can’t cope with a back five. But it wasn’t just the formation. Hull won the duels, showed the hunger, took the chances, and deserved the spoils.
The PA plays Rocking All Over The World. But this wasn’t the status quo: it was a hell of an upset. Before the game, the Opta algorithm gave Hull only an 11pc chance of a win today.
FULL TIME: Hull 2-0 Man United
They’ve done it! What a great result.
90+5 min Hull’s owner, Acun Ilicali, gets a kiss from his companion as the ball pings about in midfield. Millar, hoping for a free kick on the right wing, finds the whistle going against him, but it’s too late to make a difference.
90+4 min Is it safe to announce that Hull have won? United have had a lot of the ball, but hardly any momentum.
90+3 min Rashford’s chipped cross reaches Sesko, whose header is half-blocked, before bobbling kindly for Tzolakis. I suspect Rashford and Sesko will make hay together some time, but not today.
90+2 min “We’re going to win the league,” sing the home fans. As things stand, they’re second.
90+1 min A little through ball from Mainoo goes to … nobody.
90 min Yes, it’s six more mins. You wouldn’t back United to do much with them.
89 min Lacey is playing on the right, not in the hole, where Mbeumo now finds himself in his third different role of the day. Rumours of six added minutes. Where’s Scott McTominay when they need him?
87 min Shaw’s latest cross is safely held by Tzolakis, via a neat chest-down.
85 min Final sub for Hull: Matt Targett, who played against them in the play-off final, replaces the excellent Ryan Giles at left wing-back.
85 min Maguire shoots, hopefully, and Tzolakis saves, easily. If Hull win, as they surely will now, it’ll be the first time they’ve beaten United in the league since 1974.
83 min Rashford does well, showing graft as well as guile, and teeing up Mainoo … whose shot is blocked.
81 min Yet more crosses from United. One from Rashford just about finds Sesko, but the resulting corner yields nothing. And one from Fernandes, too close to Tzolakis.
80 min United are risking a third goal here, as they have to, and Hull sniff it until Maguire, haring back from inside-left, manages to clear.
79 min Michael Carrick plays his final cards: Dalot for Mazraoui at right-back and young Shea Lacey for Cunha as the No 10.
78 min Proper chance for United! Cunha sends a through ball to Mbeumo, whose low shot is well saved by the excellent Tzolakis. Players beginning with Tz- seem to be very good this season.
76 min Maguire, almost playing as an extra striker, is offside. United have had 14 shots, apparently, but none of them very threatening.
74 min Mazraoui feeds Mbeumo, whose shot sails over the bar.
74 min Rashford does some fancy footwork and tees up Fernandes, whose cross is a wild one. He’s been out of sorts.
73 min Chance for Hull! Drameh, on the right, hits a low shot that just eludes the post and the two teammates following up.
71 min A couple more crosses from United, aimed at Sesko but easily cleared by Hull.
70 min Two more subs for Hull: Lewis Coyle, the captain, gives way to Cody Drameh after giving his all as the right wing-back. At inside right, Elliot Stroud is replaced by Liam Millar.
67 min Two more United subs: Kobbie Mainoo for Tielemans, and Benjamin Sesko for Andrey Santos, so it’s all change in the pivot and either Bruno Fernandes is going back there or Mainoo is on his own and it’s 4-1-4-1. United could have done with Sesko in the past ten minutes, for Shaw to aim at with his crosses.
